Favorite Reads


Some of my life lessons have been (and continue to be) setting healthy boundaries with others, believing I am "______enough"  (fill in that blank with: good, lovable, worthy, pretty, smart, etc), and speaking my truth/finding my voice.  Lack of healthy boundaries with others, or codependence, can suck the life out of a relationship while you spin your wheels trying to pump life back into said relationship.  It's exhausting.  And futile.  Listening to the "not ______ enough" nasty voice traps you in a mind set that leaves you believing your self worth is crap - that you can't measure up no matter how much you try....yet you keep trying - harder - all the time.  Also exhausting.    Speaking one's truth/finding one's voice is hard for a Southern woman who was brought up to smile politely and act like everything is "just fine" even when she's in a total melt down and her world is falling apart, which becomes a way of life: smile & act like things are great.  Living in the Land of Denial works fine as long as you never peek out from under the veil to see the sometimes harsh reality you are in.

Here are my Top 12 reads, listed pretty much in the order I read them over the past 10 years, that have found helpful in my quest to set healthy boundaries, believe I'm enough just the way I am, speak my truth/face the truth without fear, and handle the tough questions about abusive relationships: 


if the Buddha got stuck, Charlotte Kasl

The Dance of Anger, Harriet Lerner

The Verbally Abusive Relationship, Patricia Evans

When Things Fall Apart, Pema Chodron

Too Good to Leave; Too Bad to Stay, Mira Kirshenbaum

Peace is every step, Thich Nhat Hanh

Comfortable with Uncertainty, Pema Chodron

The Wisdom of No Escape, Pema Chodron

It's Easier Than You Think, Sylvia Boorstein

Daring Greatly, Brene Brown

Big Magic, Elizabeth Gilbert

Polishing the Mirror, Ram Dass



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